it's time

I don't know exactly when God moved several notches down on my priority list. Working the job that I am and the hours that I do, makes it so easy to make excuses. I don't have time to go to church because I work too much. I don't have time to read my Bible because I'm always so exhausted when I finally do have time to myself. I can't get involved in any church or small group activities because my work schedule is so inconsistent.

Hm. I've been thinking a lot about the things that are important to me. And recently, I've also been overwhelmed with how exhasuted I am and how emotionally spent I've felt. In certain moments, I feel like I can't continue. So how do I persevere when it feels like I have absolutely nothing left inside of me?

I want to invite God back into my life. I want to be broken so that He can pick up the pieces and start healing my heart. I want to rely on Him for all the things I need...for strength, for love, for the role of Father in my life. After being so prayer-less, I've started offering up small prayers and it reminds me that I am not in control. That is sometimes a scary thought, but it also brings relief to know that He goes before me.

It is going to be a slow process, I know, because I've let myself think that I can do it without Him for the past year.

It's time for a change.